Twitter Good.

It's simple enough. Why? Well I have all the fucking answers, don't I?

Quick and convenient you can advise your "followers" what you are up to at any given moment, whether you be climbing a tree, eating fudge, or having unnatural thoughts about your sister. You follow people you are interested in and don't have to give thought about people you aren't. It's very easy to unfollow someone should they turn out to be a little more racist than you thought. You can use it from your phone with relative ease, like sending a text message.

People can post videos, photos, sound files, all sorts of stuff that you may find interesting. A friend of mine sees something on youtube I may find interesting, they send it. It gives me a chuckle, I retweet it and more people can share in the fun.

140 characters is ample space to explain yourself. If you don't think this is correct then you're a prick, full of misplaced self-importance and you should see a Doctor immediately. Actually, skip the Doc and come see me. While I'm not qualified in brain surgery I'll gladly smash yours in with a hammer. For fucks sake, even an astronaut can explain himself in less than 140 characters:

"I went into Space today. It was canny. @buzzaldrin #spacetwats"

Although it would be wrong of me not to point out this is coming from someone who has already written in excess of 140 characters.

Famous people use twitter. Actual famous people, not some employed fanclub running worker who could care less about whether you think Harry from One Direction is "dreamy". Twitter means that the actual famous people can care less about it directly.

I had a conversation with a work colleague a few weeks back who said that she didn't understand twitter, and asked what was so interesting about the lives of famous people. I asked what she watched on TV the previous evening already knowing the answer was "Big Brother". I simply replied that while she was watching that Zoo of Cretins I was watching Arrested Development and calling Piers Morgan a cunt to his face. Kind of.

There are bad points to twitter. It is apparently more addictive than cigarettes, although you're probably safe from lung cancer. People get taken away at customs for jokingly saying you're going to blow up America (the sensitive bastards). You get spammed by porn sites, although to many people that's not necessarily a bad thing. People also use twitter to start rumours that some famous people are dead when they are still alive. Eddie Murphy, Bill Cosby, and Jon Bon Jovi that I know of. This is upsetting and very bad, but I find it quite funny really. To be fair Bon Jovi should've stopped his own life after "Slippery When Wet" as it took massive leaps downhill from there. I'm sure there are many more bad points but I make the choice to ignore them.

There are two things that worry me about twitter:

1. The voice it gives to idiots. In my last words I called the general public a group of cunts or something. To me, that is their label. While Xbox Live gives a voice to quite a few, more people are in possession of Smartphones. Give someone a phone and a twitter account and they can voice any opinion they wish. Thought provoking and thoughtful *grits teeth* tweets outweighed by the sheer mass of racist, homophobic, and mind-staggeringly stupid shit that falls out of the mind of the general public. Really it's not the voice itself that bothers me, it's how terrifyingly thick most people are.

2. I've often thought after posting something that literally anyone, anywhere can read what you just wrote. That's quite scary.

I like Charlie Brooker. He gave us TV Go Home, Newswipe, Dead Set, and the fucking brilliant Black Mirror series. I follow him on twitter. Recently he posted something about Amazon charging an extra penny on their items and then donating this to charity. A sound, simple idea. I replied stating that CEX (a media trade-in store) asked me to donate some extra coppers from my trade in amount recently. He replied saying that he designed the logo for CEX. Charlie Brooker tweeted me directly. I didn't retweet it, I didn't mention it either, as to get excited about a famouser speaking to you via social media is very uncool.

But it was exciting and made me smile. I guess I'm no better than anyone else.